Loving Your Teenager Through Their Rebellious Stage - eBook

For parents who’ve tried everything: tracing the roots of your teen’s behaviour, and responding without losing them.

You’ve taken the phone. You’ve grounded them. You’ve shouted, and you’ve gone quiet. And your teenager is still slamming the door, talking back, lying or shutting you out.

This book is for the parent who is drained to the core, and who still loves their child deeply.

Usana olungakhaliyo lufela embelekweni. A baby that does not cry dies on its mother’s back. Much of what looks like rebellion is, in fact, the cry. Our teenagers are close to us, living in our homes, yet so much of what they carry is out of our sight.

Drawing on more than 30 years of working with teenagers and families, through camps, retreats, coaching and Parenting Teens workshops, Nomveliso Mbanga shows you how to look beneath the behaviour to the roots. She covers your teen’s body and brain, your family’s story, the patterns you carry, the decisions you’ve made and the climate of your home. Then she gives you practical ways to rebuild the bond.

The one shift this book is built on: your child is not their behaviour. You can love your teenager fully and still expect better.

Inside, you’ll learn:

• Why “we’ve tried everything” isn’t working, and how to step out of the escalation trap
• What’s really happening in your teen’s body, brain and sleep, and what isn’t just hormones
• How to define your family in a way that a “broken family” label can’t touch
• Why teenagers lie, and how to respond to the gap underneath the lie
• How to talk to your teen about family changes: a parent leaving, a move, loss of income
• How to debrief your children after leaving an abusive relationship
• Discipline that holds teens accountable without breaking the relationship, including real case studies
• When a situation is beyond the home, and how to get the right help
• How to care for your own roots as a parent

What’s included:

• 18 chapters, about 80 pages
• 30 practical worksheets
• Reflection questions at the end of every chapter
• A Family Dynamics Self-Audit with a 7-day commitment
• A guided “Letter to my teenager” exercise
• South African help and support contacts

This book is for you if:

• You’re parenting a teenager (roughly 12 to 19) and feel you’re losing them
• You’re a single parent, a grandparent raising a grandchild, or part of a blended or extended family
• You want an approach rooted in African family systems, not one imported wholesale from somewhere else

About the author
Nomveliso (Vee) Mbanga is the founder of Mayine Development Institute and creator of the Nomveliso Mbanga Teencoaching™ methodology, an ICF-accredited, indigenous-based approach to human development. She has hosted more than 20 teen-centred camps and Parenting Teens workshops.

Format: Digital PDF ebook, available to download instantly after purchase. Read it on your phone, tablet or computer, or print the worksheets for your family.

Please note: This book offers coaching guidance and reflection. It is not a substitute for medical, psychological, legal or social work support. If your child or anyone in your family is in danger, please contact emergency services or a qualified professional.

Indigenously Teencoaching Conversations™ · an indigenous-based approach to human development